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Unwrapped: Gifts For Dogs That Are More Like Children Than Pets

Spoil your pooch

'Tis officially the season for gift-giving. For us, it's 31 days of gift giving; for a month, we'll be providing gift ideas for everyone on your list—from your hard-to-please parents to your '90s-loving BFF and even your spoiled pet. Filled with creative picks that got our pulses racing, our Unwrapped holiday gift guides will make Christmas shopping a breeze this holiday season.

Look, we're just going to say it upfront: We know this 25-item-long gift guide of expensive stuff for dogs is insane. We never said we weren't crazy, okay?? Being a dog owner is kind of intrinsically crazy in that when you bring a dog into your home, you are basically committing to picking up someone's shit for 10-plus years—not to mention feeding them, paying their medical bills, massively limiting your ability to stay out late, travel, etc. And all the while, their main focuses in life are really just sleeping and ruining your personal possessions. (My dog has recently taken to digging my underwear out of the hamper and chewing out the crotch, yippy!) So, like, don't talk to us about crazy. We know crazy. But—what can we say—love is crazy.

These little a**holes we call pets are actually more like children in the joy they bring us and the amount we care for them. During a very emotional recent breakup, I think I might have lost my marbles had it not been for my pup—they're pure forces of love and light that make the handful of drawbacks beyond worth it. So yeah, treat your dog well, appreciate them every day, and—if you can afford it—spoil the hell out of them. And here's 25 perfect gifts for doing just that.

TrackR, Dog tracking tag, $29.99, available from TrackR.

Safety first! This is an amazing tracking device the size of a normal dog tag that you can track with an app on your phone. Never let that little nugget leave you alone and heartbroken just because she found a weak spot in the fence.

Wag Wear, Canvas mini dog backpack, $65, available from Wag Wear.

I mean, you might be willing to do literally anything for your dog, but sometimes you only have so many hands/pockets. Give your pup the responsibility of holding the poop bags and toys with this stylish backpack.

Dog bike basket attachment, $75, available from Amazon.

Like you would go for a bike ride without your dog. This wicker basket attachment for your bike—complete with sherpa lining and canopy— is perfect for a little dog who doesn’t quite have the speed to run along side you.

Felix Chien, Bamboo dog hammock, $250 to $329, available from Felix Chien.

Not only will this dog hammock look really cool in your home, but it’s also better for your dog’s health as it relieves many pressure points that create discomfort and arthritis. Available in two different sizes and four colors: Graphite Grey, Chestnut Brown, Kiwi Green, and Passion Pink.

Ware of The Dog, Vinyl raincoat in acid yellow, $75 to $90, available from Ware of The Dog.

Keep your dog dry and very, very fashionable when it’s raining with this neon vinyl raincoat. Like, honestly, where is the human version of this coat because we’d definitely buy it.

Canine Flow, Dog Hypnotherapy Audio Download, $11, available from Canine Flow.

According to Canine Flow’s website, “Professional Canine Hypnotherapy is a unique, veterinary-approved, safe way to transform your dog’s behaviour and aid their well-being.” Usually, with dog training, there’s an emphasis on your dog’s mental and physical energy with the command and reward system. Hypnotherapy, however, focuses on your dog’s emotional energy. Canine Flow offers downloadable audio to help with specific issues like barking or separation anxiety, but, if you’re really into it, they also offer training retreats in the U.K.

Littledogfashion, Crochet piggy hat for dogs, $36 to $50, available from Etsy.

Why not?

Petcube, camera, $149, available from Petcube.

Keep an eye on your baby when you’re away from home with this award-winning interactive pet camera. Not only can you take a peek at your pup via your smartphone (in HD video with 138° wide angle view), you can also talk to and play with her via two-way audio and built-in laser toy.

The Antler Lady, Antler chews, $15 to $35, available from Hip Hound Shop.

Antler chews have been lauded as one of the best chew options for dogs. They’re natural, healthy, odor-free, long-lasting toys that keep your dog busy while also cleaning his teeth. Kind of chic too, no?

Gamla, Gimli Travel Dog Den, $2,695 to $3,095, available from Gamla.

Okay, so this is definitely the most expensive thing on our list, and we know it’s crazy. But, come on, just look at it! Try to think of it as buying a piece of artistic carpentry. “A dual-use designer dog den and carrier, the Gimli Traveller is strong enough to keep your pup safe, light enough for travel.”

Mr. Dog, Marble Dog Water Bowl, $450, available from Mr. Dog.

Marble is such a thing right now, so we really couldn’t resist. Not only will this look very cool on your kitchen floor, but also, this marble bowl will apparently keep your pup’s water at a precisely 67 degrees, which, according to the website, is the perfect temp for a dog’s drinking water.

Fuzzu, Donald Trump Dog Toy, $19.99, available from Zee.Dog.

Oh, the joy of watching your progressive little pup gnawing on Donald Tump’s head.

Wolfpack, Cloudy Gray Leather Dog Jacket, $245, available from Wolfpack.

If you live in the bitter cold, it can be hard to find jackets that really keep your dog warm while also looking luxe as hell. Well, this real Italian cow leather and faux chinchilla fur jacket from Wolfpack is just the ticket. Also available in oxblood and rose.

Ruby Rufus, Spoilt Sweater, $105, available from Ruby Rufus.

Accurate.

Natural Dog Company, Snout Soother, $17.95, available from Natural Dog Company.

According to scientists, a dog's nose isn’t wet for no reason—it helps their sense of smell. This snout soothing stick comes highly recommended by veterinarians for pups with dry noses caused by harsh winter conditions or hyperkeratosis. Essentially, this is the equivalent of chapstick for dogs and will help keep their sense of smell sharp and their nose generally feeling more comfortable during the winter.

PetPlan, Dog Health Insurance, varies, available from GoPetPlan.com.

Hope for the best but prepare for the worst. Clearly this little nugget of fur is your world, and, of course, if anything goes wrong with his/her health, you’ll do whatever you can to make her better—but if you don’t have pet insurance, you could wind up putting off a visit to the veterinarian, potentially hurting your dog’s health, and definitely winding up with some serious bills/debt. Take preventive action and give yourself peace of mind. Also, I’ve been with PetPlan for over a year, and they’re fantastic! Some of the best coverage available, reasonable prices, and great customer service.

BarkBox, Subscription, $20/month for 12 months, available from BarkBox.

If you’ve ever had a subscription to Birchbox or Urthbox or any of the other countless little boxes of goodies regularly delivered to your door, you know how joyful it is every month when they arrive. Give your dog that same joy with BarkBox. Every month’s box is packed with innovative toys and healthy treats. Oh, but your dog is a picky little asshole? Ours too, but Barkbox is one step ahead. If your pup doesn't like an item in their box, they’ll send a replacement for free.

Ware of the Dog, Boiled Wool Avocado Toy, $20, available from Ware of The Dog

Just like little kids aspire to be just like their parents, so do dogs... probably? Give your pooch the distinct pleasure of chowing down on an avocado just like their Ma!

Found My Animal, Teal Rope Leash, $80, available from Marlon ShopFound My Animal, Teal Rope Collar, $74, available from Marlon Shop.

Ahhhh, this collar and leash set is simply perfect. Not only does the rope material and bright dip-dye color give it a totally different vibe from most collars and leashes, it’s also made to last. Give your pup some accessories that match her fun, free spirit.

Max-Bone, Duke Bed, $160 to $320, available from Max-Bone.

Us at the Max-Bone store: "Oh hi, do you make this bed in people sizes too? No? Uh, okay, just one then." Seriously, your dog will count his blessings once he snuggles up on this 100 percent virgin polyester fibre CLOUD. Durable fabric and easy-to-wash removable cover will make it a dream for you too, even if you can’t snuggle up on it yourself. Or, you know, maybe you can right after you wash it? Do you.

Gerrard Larriett, Aromatherapy Pet Spa Box Gift Package De-stress in Lavender & Chamomile, $46.99, available from Pup Life.

There’s really nothing better than a dog that smells good. And this lavender and chamomile set will fill your nose with delight while also relaxing your pup.

Bocce's Bakery, Beef Bourguignon Biscuits, $8.99, available from Wag.

Behold the dog treats everyone has been raving about. Bocce's Bakery bourguignon biscuits are made with premium hormone-free beef from NYC butcher Pat La Frieda and roasted with sweet carrots and parsley “in true beef bourguignon fashion,” according to the brand. The only other ingredient is organic rye flour—gotta love simplicity! That makes them great for pups with sensitive bellies and, because they’re low fat, they’re perfect for plump little dogs trying to watch their weight.

Wholistic Pet Organics, Supplements, $39.99-$119, available from Wholistic Pet Organics.

We all need vitamins, including your pup. Wholistic Pet Organics offers a range of different options based on your pet’s needs. No specific problems with you pet? Get her the Wholistic Canine Complete™ Soft Chews as an all-in-one pill that is packed with a laundry list of healthy ingredients, from flaxseed to kelp.

Doga Dog, Yoga DVDS, $29.99, available from DogaDog.

Okay, so yeah, the idea of doing yoga with your dog does sound kind of ridiculous at first. We won’t deny that. But, like, fuck it. Bonding with your dog while also exercising is a great way to multitask, and if you or your dog aren’t big runners, this is a perfect alternative. The video creator, Suzi Teitelman, is a certified yoga instructor who started Doga in New York City in 2001. However, there are now unrelated studios all over the country who offer yoga classes with dogs. We suggest you order Suzi’s video to get you started at home, and then, if you’re into it, look for possible classes near you.

Dyson Vacuum, Grooming Attachment, $48, available on Amazon.

Okay, this last one is really more for you than your dog. A gift from the heavens so that you won’t secretly resent your dog for getting hair all over everything you own. Enjoy!

Check out more of our Unwrapped gift guides here.