Life

Would You Love Yourself With This Unicorn Dildo?

Horned-up

Okay, let's not beat around the bush here: unicorn horns are phallic. They always have been, and our curiosity for them is beguiling. In the words of Madonna, "Sigmund Freud, analyze this."

Anyway, now you can experience their phallic nature firsthand with Geeky Sex Toys' Unicorn Horn Dildo. It'll set ya back $50, but hey, no one said pleasure doesn't come at a price. If the words "unicorn horn" and "dildo" aren't stimulating enough (and, honestly, millennial, in today's sex positive world bent on making Tumblr things, like unicorns and muted pink, a reality, why wouldn't they be?), perhaps these details will: they're made from 100-percent body-safe silicone and can be inserted up to 7.5 inches. It's also girthy, widening out to 5.5 inches at the base. It also comes in three different, jewel-toned colors. Neat!

And hey, if toy play isn't your thing, the suction cup base can (probably) make it easy to stick it to a headpiece or something, giving you the pièce de résistance of your burgeoning unicorn cosplay. Geeky Sex Toys also offers a C-3PO butt plug for those looking for an orgasm that'll take them to a galaxy far, far away.

Spencer's Gifts who?