Photo via Beyonce.com

what is beyoncé drinking?

it ain’t watermelon…

by Hayden Manders

On April 13, 2015 a series of photos of Beyoncé went up on Beyoncé’s website. She was at Coachella doing whatever it is Beyoncé does at Coachella. In these photos appeared a Fiji water bottle filled with something that did not appear to be Fiji water.

So, we ask: What fluid did Beyoncé drank? Was it healthy? Did it get her drunk (on love)? And, perhaps more importantly, why is Beyoncé transporting a mysterious liquid in an expensive plastic water bottle like some common flower-crown girl?

Possible theories from NYLON's staff include:

  • The tears of her haters mixed with ginger
  • Honey from the Beyhive
  • A rare mixture of soil, a single grape, lemon juice, and the residuals of Obsessed mixed together with a diamond-edged Nutribullet by Michelle Williams
  • House of Deréon sparkling spring water and rum
  • The fountain of youth (a mixture of honey and the sweat of those who refuse to #bowdown)
  • The talent and life force from Kelly & Michelle
  • A delicate combination of sweet tea, Hennessy, black excellence, and a splash of your fav's tears
  • Contaminated Fiji water
  • Rihanna’s ash tray so as to ascend from them; a phoenix rising, Beyoncé is
  • All of the anger, hatred, and negativity in the world, taken in through the Bowels Of Knowles, ingested so we, her delicate flock, do not have to suffer anymore
  • Or just the cayenne pepper drink she’s been known to ingest once in a while
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