Britney Spears Drops A Product-Heavy Video For “Make Me…”

Oooh abs!

Britney Spears' near-fabled music video for "Make Me..." has arrived. It's not the hedonistic David LaChapelle vision fans were hoping for, but hey, it's something. One thing's the same, though: abs...and lot of 'em.

In this version, Spears and her friends host some sort of casting call. For what? Who knows. The signs say it's for the "Make Me Casting," which could mean this is some meta-commentary on the alleged drama that happened behind the scenes with LaChapelle. It could also be innuendo and these men are auditioning to be Spears' lover, like some Illuminati scheme. Either way, a handful of very nice looking males and their very nice looking torsos do their best Magic Mike impersonations for Spears & co.

Who has that "sensational" something Spears is looking for, though? And how does Spears define sensational apart from a jaw line for days and washboard abs? Does EOS add to the sensation? What about Orangetheory Fitness? Both brands are plugged here, after all. Perhaps Spears is saying her lover needs to work (bitch) and have soft lips to make her ooh. Perhaps Spears is saying sweet nothings... or nothing at all. Perhaps this is a part of a larger plan by EOS to turn the masses into soft-lipped sheeple. Much like what happened with David LaChapelle and this music video, the world may never know.