game of thrones's new power couples, ranked

    the season of duos

    by leila brillson · April 13, 2015
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    Photo via HBO

    Oh, dear Goddess, what a frightful state I am in. Having been a long (and I do mean a long) time reader of Game Of Thrones, I have been sitting smugly through red weddings and beheadings; through dragons on the run and white walkers walking. But now, I am scared. I am lost, and afraid, and suddenly just as confused as the rest of the world. And it is invigorating.

    This season is about journeys: the journey to battle, the journey to Essos, the journey to retake the north. Everyone has a destination, and with the land of GoT larger than it has ever been, characters are finding some pretty strange bedfellows. So instead of a traditional recap, we are going to do a ranking of power couples—those duos who are now traversing the realm in pairs.

    Every week, we are going to rank each pair to see who will win—and what crazy lengths they'll go to—for the game of thrones.

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    Photo via HBO

    Sam Tarly and Jon Snow

    Though the men of the Night's Watch are not supposed to take any women, we are happy to see that Gilly is comfortably ensconced at Castle Black. A painful comparison: It is frustrating to watch Mance stick so firmly to his word, even though him "bending the knee" for Stannis would better his cause—as it feels particularly Stark in nature.

    +2 for Sam's "How many brothers can say they've killed a white walker and a Thenn? I might be the only one in history!"
    +5 when Jon puts Mance out of his misery...
    -3 ...But how will Stannis react?

    Total: 4
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    Photo via HBO

    Margaery Tyrell and Tommen Baratheon

    Oh, now this is an intrigue, isn't it? Margaery knows that Cersei is not a friend of hers, but she may not know exactly how dangerous the queen actually can be. And the queen—well, she watches how taken her gentle son Tommen is with the wily, incredibly manipulative Margaery. Watching Miss Dormer act her hair into braids has become such a treat, and something is clear: Kitten has claws.

    -2 for forgetting to knock before entering...?
    +5 for Margaery knowing darn well how to play the game

    Total: 3
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    Photo via HBO

    Melisandre and Stannis Baratheon

    The lady of fire is up in the land of ice, and it seems that she and Stannis have been biding their time at The Wall before they head to take back Winterfell. Melisandre, who understands that her sexuality is part of her power as the messenger of the "Lord Of Light," has Jon Snow in her ruby crosshairs. Now, let's see how their decision to torch the King Beyond The Walls really plays out.

    -1 for the wildly inappropriate timing of asking Jon Snow if he is a virgin
    - 5 for trying to recruit the Wildlings.
    +6 for the insane genius of that idea.
    +2 for the fiery display of power in front of the Wildlings

    Total: 2
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    Photo via HBO

    Sansa Stark and Petyr Baelish

    Watching Sansa Stark interact with Petyr Baelish is a bit like one of those nature videos where a hungry wolf is chasing down a spritely deer. Except, with her emotive eyes, it is unclear, at this point, who exactly is the hunter and who is the prey? (Don't forget, Sansa is a wolf, after all.)

    +3 for finally ridding themselves of that insufferable Robin

    -1 for all the creep-vibes

    Total: 2
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    Photo via HBO

    Brienne of Tarth and Podrick Payne

    Who else wants to just watch an entire show of just Brienne and Podrick? Having adventures on horseback, with Podrick shining Brienne's armor and Brienne losing her temper at any ne'er-do-well. Who wants to bet that Podrick's ham-fisted kindness will soon warm Brienne's bruised heart?

    +2 for Brienne keeping Podrick with her instead of giving him up
    -1 for her not realizing what an absolute gem he is

    Total: 1
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    Photo via HBO


    Tyrion Lannister and Varys The Spider

    Every since we first met Varys The Spider, the gentle-yet-conniving Master of Secrets, his best scenes were with those who understood the dynamics of power, and no one quite gets power structures quite like Tyrion Lannister. Tyrion, for his part, has seen better days. The Imp has spent his trip to Pentos drinking himself into a stupor, clearly suffering from the PTSD of shooting his father (on the can!) and strangling his lover (in his father's bed!). Varys seems to have plans for Tyrion, but Tyrion, it appears, seems to be his own worst enemy. While they might be one of the most entertaining couples on the show right now, they certainly aren't the power players they once were. That is, unless they make it to see Daenerys.
     
    -4 due to Tyrion's nasty attitude
     
    -1 for the surprise vomit
    +2 to Varys throwing shit overboard 
    +3 Ultimate mic drop: "Who said anything about 'him'?"

    Total: 0
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