The internet is like a bridge of sorts. It connects millions of people to a near-infinite amount of things. And like fairy tale bridges, trolls reside underneath. Well, proverbially speaking, of course. Trolls exist within the internet, and while they don’t necessarily stop you and ask for some password to get to where you’re going, they will stop at nothing to hinder your experience and make it a virtual living hell. Though anyone can get trolled, celebrities are more prone to them because of how forward-facing and accessible they are.
J.K. Rowling has, rather brilliantly, put the ones blowing up her Twitter mentions in their place. Unlike other famous faces, who sometimes clap back with cheap snark, Rowling, being the Brit that she is, serves her tea piping hot, with one pinky raised, and a little sugar on the side because that’s just common British courtesy. Of course, her responses are valid. They’re informed and always a little cheeky. Here are 15 of her best and realest of the real moments.
They see me Rowlin’They hatin’ https://t.co/dfiqou7vpD— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 17, 2016
No sugarcoating here.
.@sjosiah0 The Internet doesn’t just offer opportunities for misogynistic abuse, you know. Penis enlargers can also be bought discreetly.— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) May 8, 2015
I noticed you ages ago. I was just playing it cool. https://t.co/lls8UC237O— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) May 6, 2016
*I must not swear on Twitter. I must not swear on Twitter...* https://t.co/AeYLHzWjDL— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) June 27, 2015
But, swear words are merely sentence enhancers!
How horrible. Voldemort was nowhere near as bad. https://t.co/hFO0XmOpPH— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) December 8, 2015
.@anakocovic21 Maybe because gay people just look like... people?— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) March 24, 2015
Really makes ya think!
Death Eaters walk among us. https://t.co/tqKq1anHpf— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) January 24, 2016
Life imitating art.
@halfelven55ff I advise you to start following Brian Souter at once. He’s much more your kind of person.— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) September 6, 2014
Clap back queen.
.@JMcGilchrist93 Book burnings! I’ll bring marshmallows.— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) May 10, 2015
Who’s got the other stuff for some s’mores?
.@WBCsigns Alas, the sheer awesomeness of such a union in such a place would blow your tiny bigoted minds out of your thick sloping skulls.— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) May 26, 2015
10 points for Gryffindor!
@ginnyweaslettpo It’s changed me a bit, to be honest. I don’t cut my own hair any more.— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) September 7, 2014
Show ’em those receipts!
.@teuchtermac has realised I’m about to break the record for longest period on Twitter without saying ‘moron’ & clearly wants to scupper me.— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) June 18, 2015
Boy, she ’bout to do it!
@ChrisDarroch2 and you can’t spell “Slytherin”.— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) May 8, 2015