Point Break Remake Trailer Debuts

and so, so gritty

by gabriel bell

No one outside of the Hollywood email chain where the Point Break remake was born wanted, needed, asked for, or even really contemplated it. And yet, the trailer is here. The preview reveals an expectedly ludicrous rehash of Kathryn Bigelow’s 1991 action classic, where surfing bank robbers have become BASE-jumping financial terrorists because…Occupy Wall Street? Red Bull? We don’t know. 

As well, lead Luke Bracey seems like a spiritual no show, the grim use of Bourne and Bond-movie shooting style and plot points is overbearing, and the Nolanesque green color gradient hurts the eyes. It’s silly and doesn't know it's silly.

That said, the trailer also flashes enough over-the-top, post-Fast and the Furious action sequences mantastic moments from Bodie 2.0 Édgar Ramírez, and longing shots of Teresa Palmer, that we’re kind of scared that people might watch this thing. Hell, we’re scared that we might watch this thing. Are you going to watch this thing? So confusing.

Point Break: Unnecessary Reboot hits theaters this Christmas, so you’ve got time to make a decision.