Illustrated by Jihyang Lim.

How You Know You’re Home For The Holidays

You live in your pajamas, for starters

by Taylor Bryant

Holiday break is so close, we can practically see the imprint on our couch from here. The idea of taking a hiatus from real-world responsibilities (for the working bunch) and class assignments (for the student bunch) and returning home is always met with grand enthusiasm. You were probably stuck pulling all-nighters and scrambling to meet deadlines mere days before; you deserve a break.

Which is true, you likely do! But, after a few days (really, the day after Christmas), you start to realize how mundane doing close to nothing all day truly is. Ahead, we came up with eight ways to tell you’re definitely home for the holidays. You know, in case your grandma taking over your childhood bedroom wasn’t evidence enough. 

You run into your high-school nemesis at every corner

By every corner, we mean your local 7-Eleven/Wawa/Quick Chek. It starts to happen so frequently, you eventually stop leaving the house. You don’t really need another pint of ice cream, anyway.

You take up a new hobby

At some point, the monotony starts to become so overwhelming, you try to find ways to break it up. Have you always wanted to learn how to knit? No time like the present! Is reading for pleasure a hobby? It is now! Go crazy with your new activities, only to abandon them as soon as you return to your non-holiday life.

You watch every movie and television series on your Netflix Watch List

Next, you might as well take advantage of your parents’ access to programs you otherwise wouldn’t be able to watch. Go on-demand crazy.

You think about going to the gym… but don’t

It's not a vacation if you're working, and that includes working out.

Your newsfeed is full of little kids you don’t know, Christmas trees, and picture of pets

Because snaps of people lying on the couch a popular post does not make. The captions are also always some iteration of: “So happy to be home for the holidays!”

You find yourself at your closest mall midday, every day

And, as soon as you arrive, you immediately question why you thought leaving the confines of your house was a good idea.

Phone alarms are a thing of the past

Let your circadian clock take over.

You start to isolate yourself more and more

Mostly from family, and mostly to avoid helping out. But just remember: You can’t shut them out too much because, more than likely, you’ll need to borrow their car at some point… for your daily trip to the mall.