The NYLON guide to sex and relationships with a Capricorn.


How To Seduce A Capricorn

Your complete guide to loving and living with the zodiac’s earthy sea goat.

by christie craft and Mackenzie Sylvester
Originally Published: 

Consider Capricorn’s heart the toughest nut to crack in the zodiac. To say that winning this practical, status-conscious sign’s favor is easy would be a serious understatement — you truly need the patience of a saint to match Capricorn’s speed when it comes to getting to know them and wriggling into their heart.

Capricorn is ruled by Saturn, the planet ruling over hard work, maturity, and obligation to one’s duties. So, Capricorns rarely make time for chasing after love or entertaining ideas of romance — they’re occupied with securing the bag. If you’re crushing on a Cap, know this sign prefers power over pleasure, so they’ve got to be sure you’re going to enhance their standing or image, and will never get in the way of their professional aspirations. Sea goats will not be held back. Studious and diligent Capricorns are attracted to anyone whose ambition and dedication to working hard for their goals can match their own.

Still, there’s a lot more to this seemingly conservative sign than meets the eye. Case in point: Capricorn’s sex life. If you’re wondering whether Capricorns are good in bed, remember you’re dealing with an earth sign; physicality is the name of the game, and you might find that they’re quite a bit kinkier than you expected, though they’ll expect you to keep that on the DL. (Just look at Capricorn Alexander Hamilton, one of the most prolific and industrious founders of the United States — and also the politician to become entangled in America’s first salacious sex scandal.) Ahead, a complete guide to navigating the waters of love, sex, and life with Capricorn.

What Capricorn Wants In A Partner

1. Someone To Match Their Ambition

Capricorn might not place the highest priority on love and relationships, but they unequivocally know what they want when they do seek out a partner. Why are Capricorns so attracted to ambition? “Capricorns love the feeling of being able to exchange or have equal standing with someone who matches them,” CUSP astrologer Isaiah Alpheratz tells NYLON. The most valued quality they seek in their other half is ferocious drive and ambition that matches their own.

Caps need to be 100% certain that you will not become a liability or a detriment to their productivity and progress. “They ... really respect everything they have built for themselves, so they do not need a partner who potentially may damage their reputation in any way,” notes Alpheratz.

Capricorns are notoriously picky and seek the highest qualities in their companions and lovers. However, “they’re not completely classist, contrary to [popular] belief,” Alpheratz tells NYLON. “Capricorns won’t always strive for someone equal or better than them; sometimes they like to be with someone who allows them to take control and guide the relationship — you will still need to offer something in return to them, though.”

Even if your position or life goals are vastly different from a Capricorn’s, they expect you to crush anything you set your sights on with intelligence, well-planned strategy, and intense drive.

2. Someone Who Respects Their Boundaries

Not only will you be a fantastic partner in crime, but you’ll also have a life of your own. “They need to be understood,” astrologer Tess Lee tells NYLON. “They need someone who understands responsibility and understands the importance of boundaries.” Capricorns don’t feel required to stick around their partner 24/7.

3. A Person With Equally High Expectations

“Caps are picky because they have very rigid standards that they require a partner to have,” says Alpheratz. “It’s their way or the highway.” Capricorn’s sky-high standards make them attracted to slightly unattainable types. As for looks, according to Alpheratz, “Capricorns love partners who exude elegance, class, and dignity. So, good style, looking well-groomed, and having an eye for beauty is attractive to them.”

4. Someone Patient, Who Takes Relationships Seriously

Capricorns won’t commit to someone without doing their homework first. If they decide someone is worth their time and efforts, their object of affection better be all in. “They need someone who understands the [concept of], ‘I don’t get into relationships all the time. I’m in a relationship with you, and so it’s serious. And I need you to take it as such,’” Lee says.

The earth sign can move rather slowly, so respect for their pace is a must. This goes for physical touch as well. “They’re not the most touchy people,” Lee tells NYLON. If you need to be touchy-feely right off the get-go to feel a connection, a Capricorn might be an unfulfilling partner for you.

Capricorn’s Biggest Turn-Offs

1. Someone Who Betrays Their Trust

Stubborn Capricorns are hard to win over and unbelievably easy to drive away. Infamously picky, a Capricorn will not settle when it comes to where they invest their time and hard-earned emotions. Missteps in love can humiliate sea goats, so they simply won’t take any risks. “If you threaten to embarrass or hurt them, you can expect them to never look at you or speak with you again,” says Alpheratz.

2. Someone Who Maintains A Messy Appearance In Public

Showing up disheveled in any way will put a huge blotch on your standing with Cap. Appearances and public impressions are literally everything to Capricorn, and if you can’t show up to a casual date looking tidy as a pin, how on earth are you going to present yourself if you meet their family, close friends, and colleagues?

Dress to impress with this sign, and make sure that your personal accouterments are well-organized and clean. “This goes for the home, too — they need to know you keep things clean, there’s no dust or mess, and that you coordinate appropriately with your interior style,” Alpheratz tells NYLON. Nothing gets past Capricorn, and a messy personal space could signal poor common sense to them.

3. Someone Who Is Lazy Or Irresponsible

Always present your best self and make the most effort with Capricorn. “Capricorns love ambition, so if you’re somebody who is lazy, this also causes a Cap to turn up their nose and look for something else,” says Alpheratz. Nothing is more grating to this sign’s mind and soul than someone who doesn’t operate at full capacity.

Financial irresponsibility, wastefulness, and frivolity are massive turn-offs for this sign, who values security and dependability above all else. Complaining about spending money on your Capricorn date is sure to drive them away, as is groaning about how little they spend on you.

4. Someone Who Is Pushy Or Pressuring

Moving too fast, being coercive, or pushy is a huge no-no in any relationship, but Capricorn will be gone before you know it if you place any kind of pressure on them. Sea goats are methodological and prefer to go at their own pace. The only thing you’ll succeed in is frustrating them — and you.

5. Someone Who Is Overbearing

Wild displays of emotion or being too quick to share your innermost feelings will absolutely make tight-lipped Capricorn super uncomfortable. If you behave obnoxiously, are loud, brash, or overly concerned with attention, you can bet Capricorn won’t see you again. “Messiness, unproductivity, ignorance, dishonesty, and unreliability are other qualities that Caps do not sit well with, as well as being too demanding and aggressive,” explains Alpheratz. Capricorns care about what others think, and if it seems like you might tarnish their image, they’ll be gone faster than you can split the check.

What Sex With Capricorn Is Like

1. They’re Earthy And Physical

Structure-loving sea goats sometimes let their methodological, detail-focused ways derail their sexual exploits, but this seemingly buttoned-up sign is anything but in the bedroom. “Physically intimate, they love to be desired [and] to be feel empowered through sex,” explains Alpheratz.

Capricorn’s sexuality is incredibly physical. The earthly element brings a huge physical desire, but also a vulnerability that creates openness in sex,” Alpheratz tells NYLON. “This is where a Cap is most primal, but most in control. They want to know how to pleasure you and to help you reach your highest orgasm, so sex is a learning experience and one you can count on being the best sex of your life.”

2. They Use Sex As A Stress Reliever

“Sex is a release of tension, [and Capricorns] need that,” Lee says. Since stress seems to follow these workaholics around, sex is a huge pressure relief. Many astrologers consider this a tactic to ease tension and nervousness, since this serious, Saturn-ruled sign can be very shy. According to Alpheratz, “because of how vulnerable and intimate sex is, they do like to create comfort in that space.” Overall, the bedroom needs to be a stress-free space of free expression and mutual pleasure for these tightly wound signs.

3. They Have Kinks

Sometimes a Capricorn will surprise you in sex, becoming as assertive in the erotic realm as they are in their professional lives. The sea goat’s take-charge nature makes them excellent dominant partners. “They become alive during sex and love to explore the body, both their own and their partner’s,” says Alpheratz. “This sign likes to allow unorthodox or unpredictable qualities to show up during sex, as they’re usually so reserved publicly.”

As far as kinks go, don’t be surprised if your Cap has a few on the DL. “Many caps love the element of adding new experiences to their sex lives, so toys are not off the cards at all,” adds Alpheratz. “Role play, kinks, BDSM, [and] random fetishes are all aspects of sex that a Cap has either experienced or wants to indulge in if they find the right one to do so with.”

4. They’re Giving And Take Their Time In Bed

Capricorn isn’t a selfish or quick lover, usually possessing unbelievable stamina. “Think of tectonic plates always moving underneath our very feet — this is Capricorn working to get to know your body, making sure they are steady with you,” offers Alpheratz. “When they know how to push your buttons, it’ll be like an earthquake ripping through your body as they make you feel bodily shocks you didn’t think you were capable of.”

How Capricorns Approach Dating & Hooking Up

1. They’re Always Building Their Future

If you’ve succeeded in getting a date with Capricorn, consider yourself lucky. “Capricorns are not easily accessible people,” Lee tells NYLON. They’re industrious, efficient, and may even seem a little intimidating at first. “Sometimes people say Capricorns have higher standards and are a little bit more picky,” Lee says. They simply don’t waste their time on what doesn’t suit their future. The only time you can truly count on Capricorn to be out and about is when there’s something in it for them in the long haul. “Capricorns get pegged as being very business-y and money-oriented,” Lee says, “but as a cardinal sign, they are trying to build something over time.”

2. They’re Persistent With Their Romantic Prospects

Capricorns are also the most tenacious sign; giving up is not in their nature. If you’ve caught a Cap’s eye, buckle up! You’ve unwittingly entered into a carefully calculated hunt with the zodiac’s most persevering sign. Actually, you’re better off being direct with Capricorn if you’re not interested and telling them so in no uncertain terms; this sign is known to persist in the face of adversity as an unshakable admirer.

But they won’t dwell on it if you turn them down, for fear of tarnishing their reputation. Capricorn, like their earth-sign sibling Virgo, is very easily embarrassed and will avoid negative attention or humiliation at all costs.

3. They Always Weigh The Pros And Cons Of A Romance

Since Capricorn is ruled by Saturn, the planet of karma and law, sea goats will always weigh the consequences before committing to anything — including you. In love, this typically translates to a cautious, slow-and-steady route. Capricorns like to draw out the dating process and get to know everything about their companion before taking any relationship to the next level. “Trust is a really important thing for them,” Lee explains. And earning a Cap’s trust can take a long time.

Capricorn is simply not comfortable putting in effort if they cannot be confident in a tangible outcome, meaning Capricorns who do remove themselves from work for love will likely fall into serial monogamy. As Lee puts it, Caps “are very concerned about commitment and relationships that have value and that can build over time.” Again, it’s all about that future, so you’d better fit into their plan.

4. They Impress Their Dates With Money And Status

Dignified traditionalists, Capricorns will generously plan a fabulous date — usually at a classy, top-notch spot with a cultural or historical nod — and won’t hesitate to open their wallet to impress you. But contrary to popular belief, it’s not all about the money. “Capricorns are actually very attentive,” Lee tells NYLON. “They pay attention to details. If a Capricorn is invested and they like you, they will listen.”

And according to Alpheratz, Caps will spend time getting to know their date’s interests beforehand. “If you’re a lover of books, they’ll be sure to book a table for an afternoon coffee at a cafe library,” they tell NYLON. “If you love an adventure, you can bet they’ve got a ski trip or boat ride planned with you in mind!”

5. They’re Practical And Reserved

Emotionally, this sign is incredibly reserved and tight-lipped, preferring to show their affections through actions rather than words, such as “how well they plan a date for you both and even the way they treat your body when it comes to the bedroom,” says Alpheratz.

Capricorns are loyal, honest, and tremendously reliable partners. Although they come off as more practical and less romantic, that doesn’t mean they don’t have a depth of emotions. “This is a sign that shares an axis with Cancer, a sign popular for its ability to create sensitive people,” Alpheratz tells NYLON. “Capricorns are just as emotional people, but they take a longer time to show it. They need to know they can trust you with their feelings, so you’ve got to be patient with them.”

6. They’re Driven By Ambition

Capricorn is dynamic and proactive, motivated by the material, and will seek out a partner with similar values. Their dream is to be a part of a power couple, so you must be useful in enhancing their status if you’re going to be considered a serious match.

The bottom line is quality over quantity. “Capricorns need to know they’re getting an opportunity to be with somebody who adds value, who appreciates their interests, who offers them a hand to both lead and sit back when appropriate,” Alpheratz says. “Showing them they can trust you makes them want to be with you more.” Once Capricorn is confident that you’re the right one for them, they’ll work long and hard to make your love story successful.

How Capricorn Approaches Relationships & Commitment

1. They Take Things Slow And Steady

If you can land a Capricorn as a committed partner, consider yourself not just lucky, but incredibly safe. Capricorns take their commitments super seriously and won’t give up on you or the relationship at the first sign of trouble. “Caps love long-term relationships because they love to build with somebody and only share themselves with the one they trust,” Alpheratz tells NYLON. Capricorn knows that compatibility isn’t typically an instant spar, so they’re unafraid to work hard on their relationships.

“Capricorns value that sense of longevity,” Lee tells NYLON. “I picture Capricorns in long-term relationships as … those really old couples [where] one is knitting on a rocking chair, and the other one is reading the newspaper.”

2. They Want To Be A Reliable Provider

Capricorn is unemotive but always dependable, and will assume the role of your “rock” when times get tough. Capricorns are excellent providers and solid partners, though you may have to sacrifice quality time so they can focus on their work. “They’re very driven people,” offers Lee, “so in long-term relationships … they also need to have other things. They don’t want the relationship to be their entire identity.” Cap’s career and earning potential will always come first when it comes to their time, though in their hearts, their toiling for a better life is a divine expression of their love and devotion.

Capricorns take their duties seriously, so if you cohabitate, you can certainly rely on them to carry their weight equally. That same philosophy is applied to Cap’s financial contributions to any union. Capricorn is an awesome partner to have when it comes to sorting out everyday things, setting a routine, and keeping a sense of sanity in your domestic life.

However, these personalities might struggle with bringing their work home or becoming overly stressed due to their ironclad work ethic. If you can work together to ensure that the home is a stress- and pressure-free bastion away from work, the benefits to you both will be tenfold.

Capricorn loves tradition and will relish passing down old values and creating new routines. Truly, legacy won’t be lacking with a partner like Capricorn. Although those born under this sign might want to lighten up a bit at times, they make a devoted and loyal partner you can count on having in your corner for life.


Tess Lee, professional astrologer and digital creator in the horoscope and astrology spaces

Isaiah Alpheratz, professional astrologer of astrology app CUSP

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